Claire writes: “Sometimes in a conversation we simply don’t have any ideas, are stuck, and would value some insight from another person.  It happens in mentoring, in coaching and in many one to ones and if we like problem solving and/or are in a hurry, telling is quick.

Unless there really is only one solution (which is very rare), scoping is almost always more useful than telling.  Offering three or more ideas and then asking ‘Any other options?’ ‘And now you know that, what are you thinking?’ leaves the responsibility to decide with the person you are talking to.  It takes longer that ‘if I were you I would…’ and it grows people.”

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