Claire writes: “Preparing for a day with a group on fully inhabiting leadership was an opportunity to think about what stops us stepping up?  There is plenty to read and courses aplenty.  Yet when people still feel they are not quite there, apart from the positive benefits of a certain element of doubt, what might be happening?

Some of the leaders we work with are surrounded by teams – some are physically more isolated.  Nicky and I have both received systemic training recently from John Whittington who asks: What’s behind you? What’s resourcing you?   He talks about each of us coming with a plume of feathers behind us – like a peacock – people who rate us, who commissioned us, who trained us, who love us, our family of origin and so much more.  Some are resources.  Some are entanglements – the person we felt bullied by who we haven’t seen for years but whose shadow inhabits our back stage.  Unconscious entanglements can hold us back.  Acknowledged, and processed those too can become resources and make us who we are.

So what is behind you? What’s resourcing you? If you feel lonely or cut off, what needs to happen for you to notice it and bring it closer?  Who is in your cloud of witnesses? They don’t need to turn up in your building.  Acknowledging they are there can make a significant difference.

Many of the things that may be raised by this blog can be dealt with through reflection or coaching.  If it’s more complex and you can’t access it, that may be a sign that you would benefit from a different kind of support.  Happy to talk if it’s useful to work out what that might be.

© 2015 3D Coaching Ltd

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