Claire writes: “What a delight to interview Tünde Erdös at The Coaching Inn last week. You can listen here if you want to dig deep into what she’s learning about presence – that thing that we can’t see and yet that is noticeable when it’s absent.  It’s deepened my thinking on the musicality of conversations, and how much tone and rhythm can support or hinder a conversation.

Today I’ve been thinking about tone. You can say the same thing with different tones and the impact is totally different.  Offering a word or a phrase back – that someone has used – as a statement can be received as a diagnosis and might build trust. It might also break it if it feels like judgement.  Yet if you change your tone to make it into a question – simply by making it sound like an offer more than a statement, it’s an invitation to go deeper.

That’s why tone matters. (I’ve demo-d this on the audio blog if you want to listen to what I mean!).”

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