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3D Ideas 934: It Only Takes a Word

Claire writes: “Half a dozen people last week recommended that I read The Advice Trap by Michael Bungay Stainer. It’s just come out and they wanted to see if I agreed with what he says, and if it’s similar to Simplifying Coaching.

Well, I love its simplicity, agree with much, disagree with some and have enjoyed the way it has stimulated my thinking.  If the advice monster jumps in and you stop listening in conversations, the people you talk to will be glad you read this one!

One thing we agree on is the importance of interrupting when people are going round in circles or telling you a lot of story they already know.  In our training, we talk about future focussed interrupting. That means instead of saying: ‘Let’s go back to what we agreed at the beginning of the conversation’ which takes us backwards and feels a bit telling off like, that we can say ‘so, today?’ which keeps us moving forward and gets the focus back on what matters today. I love MBS’s question ‘and you?’ which is also future focussed and moves us to what’s in someone’s gift and away from what I call wavy people and he calls ghosts.

It’s amazing that it only takes one or two words: ‘today?’ or ‘you?’ to refocus a conversation that is lost.”

You can now listen to this blog through our podcast The Coaching Inn Subscribe on iTunes or podbean.  We had our first virtual drinks at The Coaching Inn last night which was great fun – thanks to everyone who came!

Ⓒ 3D Coaching Ltd 2021

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