Claire writes: “We have just been camping when there are always ball games to play with our small people. There is nothing more irritating when you’re playing a game of catch than when the other person doesn’t throw the ball back! Everyone who is playing is an equal partner in a game of catch.
Although a coaching style is partnership, our role is keeping someone company while they think. That means we want their processing to be flowing, and we need to ask, or observe only enough to keep them in flow. Which means that when I keep hold of the process, I am interrupting your flow. Phrases like ‘OK’, ‘Thank you’ may be polite – and they are also saying ‘Stop thinking – it’s my turn now’. It is more effective to lightly throw the question back with future focussed questions – like so?, and now?
The only exception to this is that there are a few occasions where I need to stop and think and make connections between what I am noticing in service of your thinking. And they are few and far between!”
Ⓒ 3D Coaching Ltd 2019
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