3D Ideas 828: Buttons

This week’s blog is written by Richard who trained with 3D in 2015. It’s never too late to apply what you are learning… He writes

“Just thought I’d share with you… I have only ever used the buttons that you showed us at Transforming Conversations in the training setting although intending to find an opportunity to use it. Last week, though, I was coaching a couple who work together and have multiple connections between, work, family, church, friends, etc. So I decided to go with it. I explained the concept of systems and asked them to map out their system with the buttons, working together.

At first, I thought it was a bit mundane and wondered if it would work. I said nothing, just watched them and noted down a couple of phrases they used that I thought were revealing. Then after a few minutes, I could see them both start to get red faced, breathing got shallower as they got frustrated with each other and not being able to express themselves. I just kept watching until the husband looked up at me and, with no words, his face and eyes were shouting ‘help’. Me: “This is hard for you isn’t it?”. Both together: “Yes!”. Moments silence…Me: “So what is happening?” Then it all came out and it become a really powerful session for them as they started to work out what their priorities are to keep life, their relationship, other relationships and their organisation all healthy.

So, thank you. I finally took the courage in my hands and tried something a bit different to talking and general use of movement, matching, mis-matching, etc. It was amazing for me to observe how I didn’t need to do anything at all or say very much for it to be really powerful! But I guess you have seen that a few times!”

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