Claire writes: “I’ve written about real play before and am returning to it again because it is so powerful.  Moving from ‘I would say’, ‘I might say’, ‘I wish I could say’, ‘I don’t want to say’ or ‘I ought to say’ to real play works. Trying out a conversation in real time is more effective than talking about talking about something to someone.

The rules are simple

1. Invite them to stand up or move (because it’s hard to think differently when they’re physically in the same position they were when they said they were stuck)
2. Invite them to speak to you as if you were the person they need to speak with – saying anything at all – no matter how incoherent it is
3. If there is any level of emotion or difficult stuff, place your hand where you were standing and move aside so they are speaking to your ‘cataleptic hand’ (because it keeps you from absorbing stuff and if they are in flow it won’t stop them!)
4. Ask how that felt – and if they would like to try it again in a more (or less) challenging way
5. Invite them to move a little between each go (same reason as #1)
6. Repeat 2-5 as many times as needed (ask if it’s useful – this is a working together not you doing something to them)
7. Use your intuition and theirs to know how far to go with this
8. This is not role play.  You are not representing and acting the part of their colleague.  So don’t join in!