Category: ICF 10 Planning and Goal Setting

3D Ideas 749: Goals

Claire writes: “Happy New Year!  Goals. Resolutions. Some people love them and some hate them. I’m not a fan. But I do like the Chinese Proverb that says that a journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step.


Nicky encouraged me to get a FitBit about 2 years ago to see if it would encourage me to walk 10000 steps a day.  The first few months were tough because for many and various reasons I had not moved much.  2015 I managed it most days. The better it made me feel, the more I wanted to do it.  Slowly I moved from driving being normal to walking being normal, and invested in better shoes and a very long waterproof warm coat so no excuses!


Looking back at my FitBit statistics, I’m interested to see that I walked 2036 miles in 2016. If I had planned to do that, I’m pretty sure I’d have given up.  Those 2036 miles came from getting up each day and deciding – on that day – to walk as much as possible – whatever that meant. It’s not my goal to better that in 2017 although I imagine I might – because now I want to walk! ‘Begin with a single step’ was exactly what was needed.’


© 2017 3D Coaching Ltd
May be distributed freely.  Please retain contact details: www.3dcoaching.com and send a copy/ link to info@3dcoaching.com  Register here to receive our blog posts every Monday by email  Register here to receive our blog posts every Monday by email

3D Ideas 722: Finishing Off

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Claire writes: “Acronyms help remember things. A group in Leicester challenged themselves to work out how to make a good ending to a conversation. They came up with CALF:

  • Check/ challenge the contract
  • Accountability – when/ what needs to happen to get this done?
  • What have you Learned so far?
  • Have we Finished?

That final question is interesting. Notice where the responsibility sits when you say ‘Have we finished?’ rather than ‘I think we have finished’. It’s useful.

David Clutterbuck’s Four Is are also a useful end to a conversation – especially if notes need to be made together:

  • What are the issues we have discussed?
  • What insights have you had?
  • What ideas have we come up with?
  • What are your intentions?

After all, a great end is as important as a great beginning.”
© 2016 3D Coaching Ltd
May be distributed freely. Please retain contact details: www.3dcoaching.com and send a copy/ link to info@3dcoaching.com Register here to receive our blog posts every Monday by email

3D Juggling 656: Coaching is simple – simple isn’t easy

Claire writes: ‘Nicky and I had a great day over the summer cutting back the materials we use on our courses to make them even more simple.  We are now teaching about 20% of what we taught ten years ago.  And people are getting more skilled more quickly.

We think there are just 15 principles to making a conversation (coaching or not) effective.  So we’ll have a look at them over the next few weeks.  None of them are rocket science as you will see!

3D’s Coaching Principles

1.    Contract for time as well as subject
2.    Talk to the person not the problem – right here right now
3.    Change hats with consent
4.    Be silent and ask questions where necessary
5.    Stand in a different place
6.    Name it – Say what you see without judgement
7.    Do it now: Real play
8.    When it’s over, it’s over
9.    Show the working out
10.    You action – we process
11.    Match for rapport – mismatch for change
12.    Name it
13.    Keep the responsibility in the middle
14.    Keep out of the way
15.    Ask them

That’s it!’

© 2014 3D Coaching Ltd
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3D Juggling 621: Own Goals

More about goals in coaching in this afternoon’s telephone Masterclass at 5pm – call the office on 01462 483798 to register.

Claire writes: “Some people love to set goals for home and life and everything.  Some don’t.  Of those that do, I notice that some people or organisations measure goals, make mini goals and work towards them and others simply make them and abandon them.  We are all different.  David Megginson has a book coming out shortly called ‘Beyond Goals‘.  He says that fixed mindsets favour SMART measurable goals and others prefer more scruffy outcomes.  David Clutterbuck’s research has found that people are more likely to change their behaviour if they think they might do something that determine that they will. Interesting.

None of this is rocket science but a helpful reminder that when we are working with people we need to make space for them to do what they need to do – whether that is to regoal or degoal.

I’m not a great one for goals for myself, but as I restart the 5:2 eating plan today it’s more about feeling more energetic than targets and milestones – although I hope that some of those might emerge on the way. So taking advice from Clutterbuck, I might have two fasting days a week!

A great way, of course, of finding what’s helpful for someone is to ask them!’

© 2013 3D Coaching Ltd
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3D Juggling 598: How definite is definite enough?

It’s been great to see people from recent coaching courses and benchmark their coaching skills a few months down the line.  Talk to us if you’d like us to listen to a coaching conversation you have had, and to give you feedback – video or audio are both possible.  Here’s a demo with a real client which we have put online in response to your requests. We have the client’s permission to share it.

Claire writes: “New Year and new resolutions – have you kept them?  Or are they wobbling?  Maybe you don’t like resolutions at all.  David Clutterbuck has been doing research on goals.  He has found that people who ask the question ‘Will I go to the gym today?’ are more likely to go than someone who says ‘I will go’.  Holding the possibility in mind seems to have better results than definite decisions.

Think about it…?”

© 2013 3D Coaching Ltd
May be distributed freely.  Please retain contact details: www.3dcoaching.com and send a copy/ link to info@3dcoaching.com

3D Juggling 595: Takeaways

Claire writes: “Wrapping up a meeting to check on who will be doing what is vital.  Who wraps up after a one to one?  Managers often summarise for their colleague.  Coaches often say the equivalent of ‘What did I do today that worked or didn’t work for you?’.

David Clutterbuck wraps up sessions with his 4Is

  • Issues discussed
  • Ideas created
  • Insights had
  • Intentions made

Might that be a useful takeaway in one to ones or meetings where you are?  Think about it…?”

© 2012 3D Coaching Ltd
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3D Juggling 543: So What?

Jane writes: “Sometimes when a client has a ‘light bulb’ during a coaching conversation they feel ready to stop.  Their sense of relief at understanding something that they hadn’t understood before may suggest to them that they know exactly what they now need to do.  And they may. But check this out. Sometimes the transition from understanding what they need to do to knowing how to do it needs some support.

Ask what they are going to do.  Ask them how they are going to do it, what they are going to say to who, and when.  Invite them to rehearse the conversations they are planning – saying things out loud is very different to saying them in your head or writing them down.  Ask them who else needs to be involved or will be affected.  Who could put a spanner in the works and what can they do to mitigate this?  Ask them whatever it takes to help them to move from thinking that they know what to do to knowing what they need to do and how to do it.  And then ask them how confident they are that can/will do it and get the result they need, and, if necessary, what they need to do to feel even more confident.

These are also great questions in a conversation with a colleague, or even your children.  Think about it…”

When you take this approach you will be reflecting the ICF Core Competencies number 8, 9, 10 and 11 Creating Awareness, Designing Actions and Planning and Goal Setting, Managing Progress and Accountability

© 2011 3D Coaching Ltd
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3D Juggling 385: Happening

Claire writes: ‘Good things happen because people make them happen. Bad things happen because people let them happen.’ said Martin Bell at a recent talk about his work as a journalist and politician.

The man in the white suit is suggesting that activity leads to good things and passivity can lead to bad. It is a challeging summary of the reflection from Pastor Martin Niemoller, a victim of the Nazis:

First they came for the Jews
and I did not speak out
because I was not a Jew.
Then they came for the Communists
and I did not speak out
because I was not a Communist.
Then they came for the trade unionists
and I did not speak out
because I was not a trade unionist.
Then they came for me
and there was no one left
to speak out for me.

Active? Or passive?’

Love this? Do us a favour and send it to five people. Who thinks like you? You could send it to someone who has stood up for you.

(c) 2008 3D Coaching Ltd