Claire writes: “I had a great chat with a cyclist this week who was telling me that the safest place to cycle is to be a third of the way from the kerb. That way, he said, people treat you like a vehicle and know how to overtake safely and respectfully (mostly!). They instinctively know how to put in good boundaries with you. When you cycle close to the edge, you’re more likely to fall into the gutter, and they are less likely to honour safe space around the bike and to drive too close.
We were wondering whether that’s replicated in other kinds of boundaries. When you set your own well enough, other people know how to navigate and respect them (on the whole). It’s food for thought.”
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Very true, as a cyclist myself that is exactly what I do in the UK. If I stay to close to the curb I risk being pushed further in with no where to go, giving myself some space keeps me safer and shows others that I expect to be respected on my journey. In other countries I may not necessarily have to do the same thing to receive respect.
Very interesting, and true to link this to personal boundaries. If I don’t treat myself with respect, what message do I send out to others and what do I say about myself? Do I give others permission to treat me without respect? How do I show how I wish to be treated (or respected)? And the opposite; what message do I send out when ‘I wrap myself in cotton wool’ and what does that say about me?