Claire writes: ‘Most of us are in multiple roles – we may be the manager, friend and supervisor of a colleague; we may the parent, the nurturer and the performance manager at home. And we are changing roles all the time.
This can be confusing to the person we are talking with. Are you saying that you think another job would be great for me as my friend? I receive that as supportive and developmental feedback. Or as my manager when I may think you are preparing to fire me?
In coaching, you may be tempted to change hats to consultant, counsellor, manager, supervisor, mentor, pastor or spiritual director. In pure coaching that is actually unethical, but many people operate in several arenas. What’s important is that you ask the consent of your client to change, only do so if they agree – and then change back.
Next time you shift roles think about whether what you are about to say could be read as ambiguous – and tell your companion which hat you’re wearing. Don’t expect them to take the role of mind reader? Think about it…’
© 2012 3D Coaching Ltd
May be distributed freely. Please retain contact details: www.3dcoaching.com and send a copy/ link to email@example.com to the listening exercise: Active seeing is as important as active listening. Think about it…”
This has absolutely nothing to do with Edward de Bono’s six thinking hats except that it reminds us of them. They’re useful. If you don’t know what they are, have a look at a summary or a video if that will work better for you (fast forward the beginning)
I just want to reiterate how useful I found the CPD yesterday and how I will be incorporating a lot of what I learnt into my own coaching sessions. I found your own style inspirational and loved the simplicity of it all, it was fun to learn amongst like-minded people.LR
Moving On: Do It! It is the most affirming ‘course’ I have taken part in …life changingAH
‘I came for coaching because I applied for a job I could have done quite well, only I interviewed extremely badly. I met with Claire, and spent two hours with her. I gained greatly from her encouraging attitude and her positive approach. She helped me to see that I greatly undervalued and understated who I was and what I did. I had a potentially excellent CV, but was expressing it in a very unexciting manner. I tended to treat as self-evident things I had done and the approach that I had taken although these could have been major selling points in getting the sort of post that I was capable of.
I now have a far better understanding of what is required, and am confident that if I do myself justice at interview I will get a job that will better enable me to use my strengths to their best advantage. I have also been on an interviewing panel recently and my understanding of the process and I believe that my appraisal of candidates has been enhanced through my time with Claire. I would happily recommend you to others, especially those who are seeking to move post after a substantial length of time in the same job.’RCRC
I have been coaching for many years and take my CPD very seriously. I belong to a supervision group and I work under supervision. I found the practicum sessions gave me the opportunity to practice, observe, reflect and plan how I would apply the learning from feedback to myself and observing others. I would recommend the practicum so highly I want to continue.Mary Cross
“I really liked extremely competent delivery and teaching, non-coercive, real, straightforwardness with no waffle, relevant, very simple and usable, transformational – honestly!” Karl FreemanKF
“It was some of the highest quality training I’ve ever had the good fortune to receive.” JTJT
Thanks for the way you run 3D, including the weekly e-mail blog – you genuinely are the best provider of training I have come across (in ordained ministry and 14 years as a teacher/school leader)Matt Roberts
“…Everything has been useful. The coaching, the mentoring, the master classes… but maybe it’s more how you do things than what you do which is the learning for me. As you told me during your last session: mastery comes with being, not doing, and it is true inspiration to work with you, listen to you guide a masterclass or a course, or be mentored by you”NP
Transforming Conversations lived up to its title. it was both transformative for us as individuals and ministers and showed us how we could transform the conversations we have both in work settings and at home. This is one of the most useful, practical pieces of training I have been offered in 24 years of ministry, I wish I had known about this from the beginning. Claire Pedrick in particular is inspirational in her openness to continue to learn and explore fresh approaches despite the wealth of experience and wisdom she brings to her practice.Cheryl Collins
Just to say how amazingly energising and helpful I found our meeting today – thank you so much! You have a real and fabulous gift for helping people get to a clarity that rings true at an inner heart/gut level.AB
A note of thanks for the thought provoking session you took us through last week …It’s great to come away with a practical and useful set of ideas that translate easily into practice.NHS
Thank you. You have been instrumental in supporting so many of us to give of our best.RW
Thank you for all the ways in which you have helped us… The coaching training has been a huge blessing and lever for change within the organisation. You have added a great deal of value and we very much appreciate it.HB