3D Ideas 1075: Yes or No

Rebi writes “The appointment started with ‘we want this to be a parent led process’… brilliant I thought. I’m on board with that, as my 11 month old sat on my lap for his development review. However what followed was a series of yes/no questions.

As I reflected on the experience, I was struck by how powerless I felt in the meeting. When discussing where my son was at developmentally, it felt odd to only be able to answer a simple yes or no. It felt like it didn’t fit the experience or context – it narrowed his ongoing journey of developing skills and growing, to a restrictive yes or no answer. The connotations being that ‘no’ is negative and ‘yes’ is positive, rather than the reality which is that both ‘yes’ and ‘no’ are perfectly okay responses in that setting. 

It felt like useful learning to remember how it can feel if we end up accidentally leading in conversations about someone else’s stuff. And that the words we use are so very important to enabling someone else to feel seen and heard.

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