How do you find the confidence you need to ‘start again’ and to behave in ways that build trust in the face of what may feel like unreasonable behaviour?
Hawkins and Smith (2006) offer some useful ideas when they consider the skills and capacities associated with being an effective coach, mentor, consultant and supervisor. They describe three things that, when we get the balance between them right, can increase others confidence in us and ours in ourselves:
When we get the balance right between these we will be, and be experienced as, confident and trustworthy. The balance is also important in interviews or pitches.
When we get the balance between authority and presence wrong our impact is unlikely to engender trust. Think about a person who is generous and respectful of others, but who always seems to miss the target. Their authority doesn’t match their presence. Now think about a person who has a great track record of getting things done, on time and within budget, but who leaves behind them a wave of emotional destruction – the person who steps on and over others to deliver results. Their presence doesn’t match their authority. Which would you trust to lead a team in an important new endeavour? Wouldn’t it be safer and more effective to ensure that the team is supported by a leader who is able to maintain a balance between their authority and presence? A person whose behaviour is consistent, who applies their skills and knowledge to deliver results through and with others in ways that leave them feeling valued?
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