Jane writes: Sometimes when we’re working with people we get stuck. Often this is a reflection of their ‘stuckness’ – it’s catching! One way of responding to this is to acknowledge it and ask them what we should be asking next, you’d be surprised at how often they know!
At other times we recognise strong emotions, which can feel a bit scary if we worry about how to respond. When someone is upset, or embarrassed, or really angry about something, we ask them what they need us to do. They will know whether they need us to stay, talk or be quiet until they’re ready to carry on, or leave.
Sometimes we’ll realise that we’ve not been listening as carefully as we should have been, or have just ‘lost the thread’. Then we may ask where the other person is in relation to where they need to get to, and what it would be useful to focus on in the time remaining. They will know.
If you’re in a coaching type conversation, and you are asking yourself a question about how to work together or what to do next, ask them. Think about it…
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