3D Juggling 476: That House

April 30, 2010 By Leave a Comment

Su writes: “There’s a regular journey I take with my children. Have done it many, many times. It’s a journey that is all about getting to the destination – we’re not in it to look at the scenery. So many times, I’m on automatic and we travel along discussing school, favourite colours and what would happen if you really did have eyes in the back of your head.

Once recently, in the middle of this train of scintillating conversation, we were interrupted by one of the children: “I know we’re going the right way”, she said, “because we always pass that house”.

“That house” was very inconsequential: a bland, beige, functional box of a house which did not demand or desire any attention. I can honestly say I have never properly looked at that house before, although I have gone past it so many times over so many years. And every journey since then, I have noticed the house. I now know the colour of the curtains, I notice when the hedge has been cut and I wonder about the inhabitants. Something which was very part of the background has been pulled into the foreground, by a chance comment that was made.

In our standard work activities, we often have to go through the process: enter into the same room with the same people for the same regular meeting. As we’re on autopilot, we are not aware of how we’re going about doing this: it could well be that we’re continuously making the same mistakes or not identifying the things we’re good at. At the next meeting you’re at, why don’t you bring some of this into the foreground? Make your team aware of what’s happening at the side of the conversation, on the parameters of the journey. Without judgement or agenda: “Lisa is being talked over”; “we avoid discussing the figures”; “our action planning makes all the difference”.

It’s important that our meetings are focussed on achieving their outcomes efficiently. By noticing what is happening along the way, we give ourselves the opportunity to understand, reflect on and even enjoy the process of getting there.

Have a look around for “that house”"

Discuss this week’s juggling at http://www.3dcoaching.blogspot.com/

© 2010 3D Coaching Ltd
May be distributed freely. Please retain contact details: www.3dcoaching.com and send a copy/ link to info@3dcoaching.com

Filed Under: 8 Creating Awareness Tagged With: ,

3D Juggling 475: The Art of Slowlyness 1

April 26, 2010 By Leave a Comment

Claire writes: “I’ve been posting a few comments on Twitter about the art of slowlyness which have received some good feedback so I thought I would share them with you. Having spent six days at Spring Harvest where it was good to meet some of you, I have enjoyed sitting and mulling in the few days since I returned. Those trapped by volcanic ash seem to have taken two very different approaches to the chaos. Those with schedules and responsibilities have been desperately trying to find a way home. My parents did a 4 day rescue mission to the Spanish border to fetch my brother and his wife. Others who have less of a pressing agenda are sitting it out and enjoying a slower pace. I spoke to a colleague who thinks his Dad will be the last Brit home as he is enjoying the slow waiting pace so much!

Reflective thinkers seem to find it easy to make space in a busy schedule to think. Activists find it much more difficult because there is always something to be done. Different solutions fit different people, although I recognise in myself that my brand-new solution will only work for a season, although it will probably come back and be fit for purpose sometime in the future. I was reminded recently of an extrovert who wanted some thinking time. The thought of going on a quiet day or even a quiet hour was too much for him. Their solution was to take a few days out, and frequent the coffee shops of the nearby city. They were alone which gave them time to think, but in company and in the hustle and bustle of the city. It worked.

My thinking space is the Starbucks at our local motorway service station. I don’t meet anyone I know, I have my favourite seat and it gives me productive time to think. It doesn’t take long to download and get some clarity about what’s going on, what’s important, and what can be left.

Where do you practice the art of slowlyness?

We’d love to hear your ideas on this. Email info@3dcoaching.com to tell us how you practice the art of slowlyness.

Try it!

Love this? Do us a favour and send it to five people. Who thinks like you? You could send it to someone who needs to slow down.

© 2010 3D Coaching Ltd
May be distributed freely. Please retain contact details: www.3dcoaching.com and send a copy/ link to info@3dcoaching.com

 

Filed Under: Managing Tasks, Silence Tagged With: , ,

3D Juggling 474: Right Side Up

April 1, 2010 By Leave a Comment

We often get emails and calls from people years after they have been in contact with us. Here’s one story:

“New Years’ day and we woke to the worst possible news. My husband’s job was made redundant! In December I lost my job due to company relocation. Then my husband’s mother died. Great start to 2009!

Both in our early 60’s, deep recession and no job prospects, we were on our own. Friends suggested we offer our services as landscape gardeners which helped with the finances. Our first job won an award for Best Pub Garden. We knew this wouldn’t be enough to live on full time so we had to cash in a small pension and cancel EVERYTHING that wasn’t a necessity.

It was when we were in France restoring a friend’s garden – free lodging in exchange for our labour, I just happened to say out loud “If only someone could see us and what we are doing, maybe we could work abroad”. Ten days later a friend rang to say she knew of someone looking for house-sitters, animal guardians and groundsmen, were we interested? So we thought (not for long I might add) and went for it. Of course, playing it safe we could have stayed home, looked for jobs offering a meagre wage but very little satisfaction. What’s the dilemma? No income here or No income there? Besides, who gets to live in a Chateau every day of their lives??

We’ve been living in the Bordeaux region since January and will return to the UK in July, with the possibility of another house sit in the area for next year.

Having gone from fairly exotic careers, travelling the world on good money with all the trimmings, we now live hand to mouth in France. Our world revolves around getting up early to walk two large dogs, feed a donkey and chickens, plus gardening duties in a totally rural existence. Had we known what that involved would we have taken the chance? Sometimes you have to step outside the box and take the positives from such an experience.

We are having the adventure of a lifetime, have gained a whole new circle of friends, marginally improved my French and are VERY happy living a French way of life.

Sometimes when your world seems as though it’s been tipped upside down, you can land the right side up. Next stop Italy???”

Try it!

Love this? Do us a favour and send it to five people. Who thinks like you? You could send it to someone who needs some hope.

© 2010 3D Coaching Ltd
May be distributed freely. Please retain contact details: www.3dcoaching.com and send a copy/ link to info@3dcoaching.com

Filed Under: 6 Do The Maths, Career Change Tagged With: , ,

3D Juggling 473: Seven Years On

April 1, 2010 By Leave a Comment

Claire writes: “I had coffee last week with John who I had met for a ten minute conversation in 2003 after his job had been made redundant. He wanted to talk then about career change and finding the right fit… or at that stage, any fit. We’ve exchanged occasional emails and this was an opportunity to talk more.

He was hardly recognisable. The diminished and downtrodden man has transfomed into someone who, two jobs on, is confident and has begun to use skills he didn’t know he had. It was a privilege to catch up on some of the missing parts of the story. Seven years ago he had no idea this kind of job existed and he has found something which is for him, truly vocational, working in a public sector organisation and having influence internationally.

For John, what had been important was being clear about skills that would make money and being willing to take a job which used them and provided for his family. And he held the vision. It was the second job which has harnessed his talents and passions.

Are you clear about what your skills are – and what are strengths and what are passions? Is your job harnessing these?’

Love this? Do us a favour and send it to five people. Who thinks like you? You could send it to someone who is feeling diminished and downtrodden.

© 2010 3D Coaching Ltd
May be distributed freely. Please retain contact details: www.3dcoaching.com and send a copy/ link to info@3dcoaching.com

Filed Under: Career Change: 1 Know what's in your toolbox, Vocation and discernment Tagged With: , , ,

3D Juggling 472: Digital Danger?

April 1, 2010 By Leave a Comment

Jeremy writes: “I saw a chilling powerpoint slide at a well-respected business school yesterday. Divided into four quarters, it displayed the 20 or 25 different types of communication technology available in modern life and business today and allocated them to quartiles according to their suitability for various functional requirements.

All the things we use were there (emails, mobiles, texts, social networking, tele-conferencing etc), plus several I had never heard of! There were many additional web-based ones, some only appropriate to international corporate life. It made an impressive, colourful and complex display which took several minutes to absorb!

So why was it chilling? Because the simplest and most direct communication medium was nowhere on the slide. The possibility of a face to face conversation was absent. Even the “resolution of conflict” section didn’t include it.

You might argue that it was obviously meant to be assumed as an alternative… and that then becomes an issue we must face. The danger nowadays is that we categorise a personal conversation as a luxury, the medium of last resort and not the first.

The original slide was about making good choices of technology, and that is fine. However, there is a “use it or lose it” dimension to replacing simple, straight conversations with electronic alternatives. If we choose, through cultural or peer pressure, or convenience, or even fear, to habitually choose to exchange digital messages rather than facing people to both listen and talk, it could all become very addictive, and the choice element might oh-so-gradually disappear!

If there are really important conversations you need to have, or difficult messages you need to pass to the real people with whom you live and work, don’t rule out the face to face option without careful consideration.

If you lack confidence in this arena, why not talk to 3D about Coaching for Excellence or other appropriate and helpful interventions?

Love this? Do us a favour and send it to five people. Who thinks like you? You could send it to someone who is totally techie.

2010 3D Coaching Ltd
May be distributed freely. Please retain contact details: www.3dcoaching.com and send a copy/ link to info@3dcoaching.com

Filed Under: working with people Tagged With: , , ,

3D Juggling 471: Listen!

April 1, 2010 By Leave a Comment

Claire writes: ‘Did you know that SILENT and LISTEN contain the same letters…

 

 

 

 

 

 

Try it!

Love this? Do us a favour and send it to five people. Who thinks like you? You could send it to someone who likes to talk!

© 2010 3D Coaching Ltd
May be distributed freely. Please retain contact details: www.3dcoaching.com and send a copy/ link to info@3dcoaching.com

Filed Under: 5 Active Listening, 6 Powerful Questionning, Silence Tagged With: ,