3D Juggling 398: Rabbit in the Headlights

September 30, 2008 By Leave a Comment

Peronel writes: “My brother texted me in Crete very early in the morning on the day the news about XL broke. My responses were various. Indecision. I had a balance of choices and was tempted to defer to those who “know best”. Yet there was pain in the indecisiveness and the not knowing which way to move. If I acted on one piece of information, was I alienating myself from others? If I waited to be guided by advice from “the authorities”, would I have control over the length of time I would be “caught in between knowledge and action”? Was following my gut instinct to cut and run immediately an overreaction, recognising that this was not an invasion or war, but a breakdown of transportation!

It appeared that I had no one helping me make the decision. That was not true. What was true was that I had no one making the decision for me. I needed to take ownership of the decision in order to regain my sense of balance. Once my first decision was made to get a new flight on the credit card ASAP, I worked through the outstanding issues one by one: find new accommodation, cancel previously arranged accommodation, reorganise transfer details; arrange to borrow some money. And as all of those points became clear, there was someone available either in person or on the phone who was willing and able to help at each stage.

How like life! Make the first step – just do it – and then it’s possible to get moving. So when I made the choice and actioned my decision, I was no longer wobbly, feeble and acting like a rabbit in the head lights. I was out of the glare. And able to accept the help of those who were in a position to help me… As for XL: we still have to have the discussions! Glad I did not wait.”

Love this? Do us a favour and send it to five people. Who thinks like you? You could send it to someone who is BACK from a holiday!

(c) 2008 3D Coaching Ltd

Filed Under: Managing Tasks Tagged With:

3D Juggling 397: Extreme Listening

September 23, 2008 By 1 Comment

Claire writes: “As someone who is an extrovert thinker and doesn’t know what they’re thinking until they speak, I was delighted this morning to receive notes taken at the listening talk. Now I know more about what I said than the mindmap I had in my pocket! I also know how it landed with another person.

Listening is an interesting skill. We all have it – to some extent or another. And most of us are highly trained and skilled at one small part of listening: the CEO who listens for direction and to fix, the health professional who listens to diagnose, the lawyer who listens for evidence, the child who listens for a way to get you to say yes. And when we listen for something, we’re not actually hearing what the person is saying as our listening sieve is holding the things we are listening for and letting the rest go through. Listening to understand happens at a much deeper level and is incredibly powerful. Try it! Try listening to someone else without thinking about what you will say next, without thinking how it connects with your own story, and without judgement or diagnosis. I’d love to hear what you discover.

Extreme listening like this can transform the way people think and act. It’s a gift. (PS I may be able to listen at work but ask my family and they’ll tell you I don’t carry the skills home!)”

Love this? Do us a favour and send it to five people. Who thinks like you? You could send it to someone who you think is a great listener… or not!

(c) 2008 3D Coaching Ltd

Filed Under: 5 Active Listening, 6 Powerful Questionning Tagged With:

3D Juggling 395: Brunch

September 8, 2008 By Leave a Comment

Claire writes: “We had a big family celebration last weekend and went out for Sunday Lunch at a restaurant in the Midlands which is hoping, with reason, for a Michelin star. My brother has been there before and we had high expectations and felt lucky to get a table. On arrival we were handed the brunch menu. There were 2 lunch choices – roast lamb or duck salad. The rest was definitely skewed towards breakfast. When we enquired about starters we were told that we could choose from the menu. Didn’t fancy porridge or croissants! And even more surprisingly we were brought blueberry muffins… with the wine!

Whether we are selling a meal or ourselves, it’s important to be clear about what we are selling. It’s equally important that we consider what the customer or organisation want. It won’t surprise you to know that there were only 12 people in this restaurant at peak Sunday lunchtime.

If you’re looking at a change of job, how are you going to find out what the organisation wants? And how will you sell them what you bring? Because you may have many more transferable skills than you think… but it’s all in the marketing and how you communicate that. If they want a main course, they won’t be looking for blueberry muffins! But you could sell another item using the same or similar ingredients. After all adding smoked salmon could have produced smoked salmon blinis with blueberry coulis.”

Love this? Do us a favour and send it to five people. Who thinks like you? You could send it to someone who you know who likes food!

(c) 2008 3D Coaching Ltd

Filed Under: 4 Have a vision and a strategy, Career Change: 1 Know what's in your toolbox Tagged With: ,